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MAC
06-29-2004, 06:32 PM
Britney Spears Engaged to Dancer Boyfriend (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A7222-2004Jun26.html)

Just months after annulling her quickie wedding to a childhood friend, pop idol Britney Spears is ready for another trip to the altar.


Her personal publicist and her label, Jive Records, both confirmed Friday that the 22-year-old singer is engaged to marry her new boyfriend, dancer Kevin Federline.

No further details were immediately available.

But Federline reportedly has been dating Spears for about two months and moved in with her after she underwent arthroscopic surgery two weeks ago to repair a knee injury she suffered while shooting a music video.

According to media reports, Federline, 26, has a 2-year-old daughter by his ex-girlfriend, former "Moesha" TV actress Shar Jackson, who also is pregnant with a second child.

Federline reportedly met Spears during her 2000 tour, when he was in the opening act, and also was a backup dancer for Spear's former beau, pop star Justin Timberlake, at the 2002 MTV Video Music Awards.

Spears and Federline were first captured by photographers together in Santa Monica, California, in April and were chased by the paparazzi again during her European tour.

Their engagement comes fewer than six months after Spears was granted an annulment in early January to dissolve her surprise two-day marriage in Las Vegas to a childhood pal, Jason Allen Alexander.

Spears, whose latest album, "In the Zone," was released in November, announced last week that she was canceling her North American summer tour dates while she recovers from knee surgery.
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so...he and his ex-girlfriend have one kid and she is pregnant with another

but that's over! he's in love with britney and they're gonna get married!!!

well, it's ok, it's hollywood.

ladies and pregnant men, I find it amazing how ppl are so willing to suspend their understanding of human nature for the sake of "love" yet they refuse to stop believing in gravity and time. (two things you can neither see nor measure without special tools made by ppl who believe in such heresy)

Now, who am I to preach about building a relationship?

I'm me! The L0v3 Lo53r!!

So lets start off with the worst and work our way down to the plausible.

1) Young.
Youth promises ONE thing. They will grow up and change. I wish everyone the best but outside of poetry and 1950's movies young love is not designed to outlast your video rental late charges. It only trains us to pursue love. It has a 1/2 life of 30-120 days. (as with all 1/2 lives the other half may be a year or more) but the good side is you fall in love, you feel great, you have fun and when it gets weird, you get mad/sad/whatever and break up. (hopefully you two where the only "kids" involved) Young love is d00med!!! Yet we are drawn to it. So, it’s death serves a purpose.

2) Desperate
Just broke up, unhappy in the current relationship, the unbearable weight of life crushing the soul, type of person. These are the ppl who hook up because there's no other light in their bleak dark universe! [/melodrama] I think one of the most disrespectful things you can do to someone you love is to hand them the baggage you worked so hard to pack for yourself. But then again, anyone stupid enough to think that you got where you are because of life treating you poorly deserves to watch the train wreck from the tracks.
The good side to this is that carry on bags can be filled with good stuff if good ppl will stop and fill them before the trip and the emotional baggage may get lost when you change planes. (don’t wait at the carousel!)

3) Horny
I know! I know! You're thinking "But MAC! Horny applies to the first two as well."
Yes, it finds it's way into everything. But “horny” all by itself ranks higher than the first two because what you want from the relationship is much clearer and easier to achieve. Unfortunately, while the first two have a bright potential, horny does not. Horny just ends up with you, years later, wondering why everything you did was based around being horny. But up until then, I’ve been assured, you’ll pretty much be happy with what you get out of it (except for AIDS that would suck)

4) By Design
“By design” relationships are one of the most plausible forms of relationships IF and ONLY IF both parties understand what they expect from their design. Most ppl find something un-romantic about this but be honest; if you are relying on and sharing with someone wouldn’t you want to know that they depend on you to give them something they can’t just buy in a store?
Examples:
Some guys just want to come home to a clean house and a dinner. They will marry and put up with bitches of the foulest caliber. But the bitch will have the house clean and dinner ready.
Some gals want the security of money and a successful man. They will tolerate him being gone to work all the time and raise the kids by themselves but when she wants that new Cadillac, he writes a check for it.

Now you can see how this can become a hollow arrangement. But only if the two ppl are so shallow and selfish that they are only concerned about their own “design” Normally people with successful relationships have quietly arranged their design and look for it subconsciously. Many, many long term marriages from other wise healthy relationships break up because one thing about one person changes and suddenly the “design” doesn’t work. It makes me sick to see “loving couples” so inflexible that one alteration in motivations destroys the relationship (except when that motivation becomes drugs)

5) Succession of hostilities
The most reliable way to have a successful relationship is to stop fighting it.
How much more can be said about that?

We fancy the ability to flex our free will and choose who we love. But that’s not how love works. Success requires that some end goal be met, and you only function within a certain set of parameters. You simply have to stop fighting your heart. Quit telling yourself that certain things matter and you MUST have them and other things DON’T matter and you should be ashamed for even noticing them. A relationship is a matter of balance The hearts in play are weights and the circumstances are the arms of the scale.

So stop fighting the leverage and see how you measure up.

Or marry that dog of a dancer from your ex bf’s last tour

Mudflap
06-29-2004, 07:12 PM
The above pontifications were inspired by "The Power of Love" by Huey Lewis & The News.

Smug Git
06-29-2004, 08:52 PM
MAC is stronger and harder than a bad girl's dream.

MuffyTheVampyreLayer
06-29-2004, 09:01 PM
Celebrities seem to get extra attention everytime they start a relationship, get married, or end a relationship. Is it really any wonder they do it so frequently?

Mudflap
06-29-2004, 09:38 PM
Speaking of relationships, where is POS?

He quit posting here.

No staying power.

Poor Muffy.

MuffyTheVampyreLayer
06-29-2004, 09:56 PM
Hehe. POS is all busy with his new job as a biostatistician, and thus can't piss around half as much as he could while he was lecturing information science. Plus I don't think this forum was geeky enough for him. He's wonderful, he even held my hair back while I puked and got me a clean bowel the other night, then he got a flannel so I could wash the vomit off my face. That's love for ya! ;)

Torque
06-29-2004, 09:58 PM
A clean bowel while you were puking? Thats just kinky.

MuffyTheVampyreLayer
06-29-2004, 10:06 PM
Teehee - I meant bowl! But thanks for the mental imagery Torque :D

ms. bing
06-30-2004, 12:01 AM
i choose subconcious by design. my first marriage was the young and the horny. the only problem is that somewhere along the way the subconcious became the concious and now i feel like i meet men with a checklist in my hand.

Billyman
06-30-2004, 12:39 AM
Set aside your own insecurities and you’ll lessen that problem.

Escape Artist
06-30-2004, 12:56 AM
If you HAVE to think about it that much, maybe you shouldn't be in the relationship.

If you do it despite said relationship, maybe you need to work on yourself.

It's funny, but the best-operating things in our lives are the least noticed; and relationships aren't any different, I don't think. Problems in the first place either get fixed or they don't, however much you philosophize...and if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

My poorly illustrated vantage point, anyway. I'm not delving into all the facets.

ms. bing
06-30-2004, 02:26 AM
actually, due to said checklist i am not in a relationship and have no intention of it. my insecurities are seated in the fact that i won't be happy until i have made it possible to take care of myself and my daughter on my own. until i don't need to be taken care of, i won't allow myself to be taken care of. so the checklist is handy. it immediately eliminates everyone so i am in no danger of revealing my insecurities.
works for me.

jess
06-30-2004, 09:13 PM
Actually I heard on the radio today that the whole reason they are getting married is because she is already pregnant with his baby. Due in December. So now he's got 2 women pregnant.

MuffyTheVampyreLayer
06-30-2004, 09:17 PM
Re: Bing's checklist.

Not a bad idea at all IMO. I made one myself, if only to stop myself being such a loser magnet. Seemed to work :). I think you've got the right idea ms bing (insecurities aside, that's a whole other kettle of fish), look after yourself and your beautiful daughter, and don't settle for any old loser that comes along at some time where you might feel like a bit of company.

ms. bing
07-01-2004, 03:19 AM
i think i've become set in my ways in my old age (relatively speaking), and the thought of bringing another person into my life from the outside is just extremely uncomfortable. and i did tend to be a bit of a loser magnet. so there you go. i guess if i just really wanted to have a romp (physically speaking this time) that could be accomplished, but it usually doesn't come up, and it usually passes very quickly when it does.
good to know ms. muffy has already boldly gone down the path where i seem to be going, and has ended up with someone who will hold her hair back when she vomits. gives me hope. :)

PB
07-05-2004, 02:05 PM
I married Mudflap.... love is often found when you least want it, expect it, or look for it..... but will often find you when you need it most. He loves me enough to hold my hand while our daughter was born. he loved me enough to give up everything and move 1100 miles to be with me... i fell in love with him without trying to.... what we bring to each other is pure love.. and not something that was forced.. he helped me mend my heart.... and captured it along the way... now he holds it for as long as we both breath...

MAC - I think you were missing another catagory in there... it should engulf this type of love as well..

Bing - only bad thing about the list... when you find one that passes the list, most likely your find something to add to the list just to keep him from getting through.. it's natural.

Pianomahnn
07-05-2004, 04:31 PM
Mud is The Game!

Barbie
07-05-2004, 06:51 PM
Originally posted by MAC

1) Young.

2) Desperate

3) Horny

4) By Design

5) Succession of hostilities


All of thee above - and all of thee above seem to work in perfect harmony.

My husband and I view our marriage as a practical business venture.

MAC
07-06-2004, 04:05 AM
ahha!

valerie found the catagorical error in everyone's "opinions" about everyone else's LOVE

no one

(I should make that bold or big or something)

NO ONE

(that's better]

no one, can tell what's in your heart unless they are in there, too

so when you look at a pair of young/desperate/horny/seemingly shallow people you think about what I put in my first post. You classify them and make you bets. 99% of the time you will be right and THIS, you think, is enough to justify the opinions. (like wise, lovers seem to invite criticism and opinions and then seek comfort when love fails, but that's another topic)

but, bet all you want to, only the two people involved get to succeed or fail.

that being said, the sword slices the other way. you're ideas of what works doesn't mean shit to the person looking for love and trying to discern it's potential in the eyes of some person looking at him across the produce isle at the grocery store.

the apple rots from the inside out, don't worm your way in there to see how it's going

hmmm

and don't bite into something until you thump it to see if it's ripe.....

I think I lost my point

oh well.

Mudflap
07-06-2004, 05:38 AM
All I can say is...

...I can't wait to meet the woman that next captures MAC's heart.

PB
07-06-2004, 01:48 PM
Originally posted by Mudflap
All I can say is...

...I can't wait to meet the woman that next captures MAC's heart.

yep... worms and all.......... and i'd want to be one of the first people to tell her how lucky of a woman she is... (even if he gets mad at me for being a worm, or and apple, or a thumper.. or something.. I don't know i got lost and couldn't tell if he was mad at me or what.. )

Billyman
07-06-2004, 11:10 PM
Originally posted by PB
I married Mudflap.... love is often found when you least want it, expect it, or look for it..... but will often find you when you need it most. He loves me enough to hold my hand while our daughter was born. he loved me enough to give up everything and move 1100 miles to be with me... i fell in love with him without trying to.... what we bring to each other is pure love.. and not something that was forced.. he helped me mend my heart.... and captured it along the way... now he holds it for as long as we both breath...

That was simply beautiful.

ms. bing
07-07-2004, 08:05 PM
i've met the female who has permanently captured mac's heart.
she's gorgeous, perfect, blonde, and she turns 7 this october.