Togo Tango

[Koliedrus]

For reference, this thread is an offshoot of the Togo Mambo (http://www.thehypertribe.net/forum/showthread.php?threadid=9478)

I need a secretary. I don't care who "she" is but she needs to be... um... saucy.

Her emails will contain the following in her headers:

Name: Biggun, Anita, LG Industries

She'll handle contact with Mathins while Leslie is off on urgent business. At first she adheres to her boss' rules. Eventually she flirts by sending a picture in business attire.

Anita doesn't have to be one person. She does, however, need to appear as being the same person once the pictures start.

The account has been created. No further action has been taken at this point.

[Koliedrus]

My "WAIT" gland failed again.

Mathins,

Application received.

As I informed you earlier, my business has many facets. I spend more time in my jets than at my desk.

My Administrative Assistant will be fielding my incoming while I'm in transit. Data connections tend to fail in some locations. Our SatLink will allow me to make important decisions.

My Administrative Assistant is Anita. While I am away, she will faithfully handle correspondance and forward information to either myself or one of my staff. (I've taken care of the loyalty issues,)

Anitia will be in contact with you soon. She is my trustworthy "Right Hand". (Don't tell my wife ha ha)

I'll contact you once I deal with the current mess.

LG

[Koliedrus]

Uh oh......

I did a pic search for Irish girls in business attire.

No shit. You people are fucking up my searches by making porn the most relevant!

On the plus side, Anita can be a she-male!

[Billyman]

Any latest developments? I'd help but my brain hasn't been functioning well enough lately.

[Koliedrus]

With this introductory message from Anita:

Mr. Gure,

Doctor Guite has instructed me to handle messages from you with high priority.

Be advised that I must ask you for patience.

I'm instructed to terminate contact if a response is not received within 18 hours of this datestamp.

Anita B., LGI


Anita is now a trusted contact source.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I recieved your mail and the content well
understood. I really want you to know that I am happy to hear from you
never mind that my proposal wasn't not directed to you but all the same I
still appreciate having it done this way because all I wanted is the
way and whom that I will be trusted open no matter how the person came or
how close he or hse is to me. I can see that you was directed by Guite
to handle this transaction with me but bear in mind that I am not
rushing things neither I am looking for someone to for anything else but all
that I am looking fowards is someone that I will have this claim doine
together with as one family for the betterment of both of us. I will
not fail to let you know that the content of this mail was not understood
clearlly but all the sdame I know what is all about. I am still waiting
for your urgent clarification towards this mail so that I will know
nwhat next to do because time is not on my side considering the urgency of
this transaction.

Your's partner,
Gure.

That's where we stand as of now.

If you would like to contribute to Anita's correspondence with Mathins, post them in one of the Togo threads or send an email to:

Anita Biggun - nanyapop-anitab@yahoo.com

Write it as if you were "her" (to be sent directly from her), Leslie Guite (to be forwarded as inline text with headers removed), or as some other character you wish to contrive.

Fire away!

(Addendum: No pictures have been sent. Yet.)

[Koliedrus]

Just to keep Mathins' interest:

[Koliedrus]

Today's response:

Dear Anita,

I Hope you are fine today, I received your maila and the content well
understood. I Really want you to know that I heard all what you said as
far as this process is concern. Meanwhile I will be waiting patientlly
to hear from you and my boss as soon as posible so that we can have
this transaction finalize without much delay because of the urgency that
it demands. I am waiting to hear from you people.

Gure.



Get your dialogues ready if you want to participate. It looks like I've bought us some time for idle chit-chat.

I think maybe it's time Anita shows Mathins a picture of the inside of LG Industries main office complex. Hopefully we can get Mathins to take a pic of himself.

(And since this thread might wind up being full of pics, I'll move it to D&D)

[Koliedrus]

Anita's response:

[Billyman]

Jolly good show old chap.

Despite the piktars, this is still suitable for MFC (in my opinion). ;)

[Koliedrus]

Ivana has penis. Think of it as a pre-counter-opposiitional strike. Whatever it's called these days.

That comes later.

[Barbie]

Anita is a whore...

any word from Mathins?

[Koliedrus]

Indeed :D :

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and the content well
understood. I will abide to your direction as along as it goes towards
the sucess of this transaction and claim. I really want you to know that
I saw your picture which you attached to me with you little watch dof
which id quite impressed. I don't know where to start to explain my self
to you now which I have already did in my mail to your boss. I am Gure
and I reside in Lome Togo. Lome is the Capital of Togo and it is a
small country with 4.5million population. I am a good christian and I have
married but without a wfie now because my wife died some years back and
since then I still just like this. I am looking young and I am a young
looking guy that is at his early 40's. I will be glad to know more
about you too. I most confess that you look good in your picture which
prompted me to tell you about my self. I would have giving you my picture
now but the scanning machine that is close to me is bad which will be
restored soon. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response towards
this mail.

Your's Sincerely.
Gure.


As for Anita being a whore, notice that I'm careful not to mention GENDER! Believe it or not those are pictures of a GUY.

Dammit! I should have named one of the twins "Ayava". That pic goes out last.

I think we should keep it up for as long as we can (pardon).

[Koliedrus]

I think it's safe to dispense with the quilted background and pink text. Take for granted that it's now Anita's trademark.



Subject: Re: I AM BLAD TO HEAR FROM YOU.


Mr. Gure,

May I refer to you as Mathins?

I assure you that my intent is to see this transaction come to a satisfactory conclusion. We don't want my head in Dr. Guite's lap, now do we ;-)

I received a brief message from him last night regarding his status. It was encrypted flash-traffic on a secure channel stating only that he would be "Level 3". That means he's run into some unforseen problems and will be out of contact for longer than we expected. Frankly I'm a bit worried about his safety. Level 3 is bad news. He's in some sort of danger. If he doesn't log on to the network within 21 days, the "Failsafe Procedure" will kick in. He's never told us what that will do, only that it will instruct us "if the time comes".

I'm a bundle of nerves! Keep your fingers crossed.

I'm glad you liked my pictures! Thank you for the compliments! You are so sweet! Clammy says, "WOOF!" :-)

I'm so sorry about your wife. I understand if you would rather not talk about her passing but sometimes we just need a shoulder to cry on. I know I do. I have two of them in case you need one.

I hope you get your scanner fixed soon. You seem like a really wonderful man.

Back to business. I'll let you know what's going on just as soon as I know myself.

Take care,

Anita

Right.. So if Leslie doesn't respond in 3 weeks, the "Failsafe" kicks in. That can do anything from blowing up the office complex to opening secure documents.

Meanwhile, Anita's getting worried and depressed. With Valentine's Day coming up, "Mathins" might be persuaded into taking a pic of himself holding a piece of paper with a heart surrounding Anita's full name. That would be Nanner Pudding Icecream on a slab of Italian Cream Cake, so I won't put my hopes on it.

Oh yeah. I did a logo just in case it's needed.

[Barbie]

This is like some sort of sick movie. I can't wait to see how this ends.

You're style of writing is hard to follow though. Some times she sounds sofisticate, other times, impish...

Think he'll be on to you?

[Koliedrus]

I sincerely doubt it. From where I sit, it's more important to learn more about Mathins' fictional persona than the one we control.

Anita can have facets. I've given an open invitation to cut and polish this rough stone. Hell! I don't even know if she's a girl yet! :D

Judging by the latest, "Mathins" is a bit befuddled. He thinks Anita is insinuating that Mathins is a threat.


Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine again, I received your mailall what you said noted.
I want you to know that nothing will so ever happen to my partner my
Dr. Guite because my business is very important to me which I believe
that we will have it done without any problem and in that case we will go
and come back safely. I will also like to have the picture which you
said about and all the things that I expected to hear from you about your
self you refuse to tell me why. I am waiting to hear from you.

Mathins as you so said.


First-name-basis complete. I'll do damage control while you guys go OOoooooommmmmmmmmm "I am Anita".

I'll go "temporarily emotionally distressed" for this. This'll be a tough one....

[Koliedrus]

Don't forget that we're dealing with criminals who just want into our bank accounts. Yes, there is more than one.

Mathins,

Leslie's current venture doesn't involve Togo. Once he hops on a jet we rarely know where he will end up. Our best estimates place him in Uganda.

We have three weeks. Hopefully he'll reply before then.



I get the impression that you want to see the pictures Ivana and I took.

I'll tell you what. I'll make a side deal with you.



Draw me a heart, put my name in it and send it to me for Valentine's Day and you will get a peek at the rest of me.



No picture from you, no deal.



Please, keep this to yourself. Leslie would have a fit if he found out.

Blushing,

Anita

[Barbie]

OMG...YOU'RE A WHORE KOL! ;)

[Koliedrus]

Technically, I'm undercover, dressed in drag. With no backup.

Oh shit....

[Barbie]

no backup?

I got your back.

but I don't look like Anita. (Thank Gawd)

[Koliedrus]

Neither do I.

Thank you :)

Can we fit this in somewhere?

http://launch.yahoo.com/video/default.asp?vid=1085678

[Barbie]

music videos?

[estero]

OMG how does it end!!?!??!??!?!

[Koliedrus]

No response this morning. I may have to light a match under his ass.

How does it end? No real way to tell. This stuff writes itself as we go along. There are 7 pictures in Anita's "portfolio" if that can be used as a guide. Could be that I was too forward and it's already ended. Could be that he's out getting that picture made. Maybe he's superstitious and thinks Friday 13 will blow it for him.

Meanwhile, "Mathins" has been leaving his little footy-prints hither and yon:

http://www.netscalped.com/_disc4/00000505.htm

http://ecommunity.uml.edu/bridge/guestbook.htm

http://www.async.com.br/pipermail/spam/2003-August/001829.html

Hopefully inspiration will strike. I'll sacrifice a few beers and do the Pee-pee Dance just in case.

[Koliedrus]

Here's what the Muse jammed into my skull:

Mathins,

I hope you're OK today. We got a "Level 2" from Dr. Guite last night meaning that he's allright but still unavailable for contact. I'm not a superstitious person normally but with today being Friday the 13th, my stomach is a little nervous. Nothing to worry about, though.

Ivana and I have been doing well at managing the company projects and using what little spare time we have to gain more access to the financial aspects of LGI just in case. So far, we've located the primary account files but the accounts are encrypted. Ivana knows someone who can help us open them up but we're waiting for a return message. And just so you don't think we're breaking company policy, Dr. Guite would want us to keep LGI running "business as usual". Believe me. I know him. Too well.

About my last message to you, I think I should apologize if I was out of line. Sure, it would be nice to see you holding a Valentine for me but it has nothing to do with your business with Leslie. Forgive me for being in a "mood", please. I'm having trouble getting over my ex-boyfriend.

A little bit about me... My daddy was Irish and my mom was half Polish from my grandmother's side. Mom and Dad.... This is hard to talk about...

Mom and Dad died when Ivana and I were 12. They were having a picnic on their 14th wedding anniversary. They were found on their picnic blanket, wrapped in each other's arms, stung to death by fire ants... They were partially eaten by wild animals before they were found. The coroner said that the two bottles of wine they drank and the venom from the ants meant that they went painlessly.

My mother's sister and her husband adopted us. We've been living in California with them ever since. On our 15th birthday, took us to the courthouse and let us change our last name. "McBiggoon" had kids laughing at us all the time but Ivana and I wanted to keep daddy alive in our hearts so we changed the spelling right there on the spot.

We met Leslie in an internet cafe almost three years ago while we were working on our mid-terms. Ivana and I decided early on that it would be best if we persue different interests. That worked out! Ivana went for the IT skills while I got my training in Communication> We are a good team when we're together. Ivana's knowlege compliments mine. We're like two halves of a whole.

I've gone on too long with our history. I'm getting urgent messages left and right (and handling them quite well, I think ;-) )

As I told you before, Ivana and I were a little bit drunk when we took the pictures. Since you're a religious man, I don't want to offend you. I hope I've done well by covering what should be covered, both in this message and in the picture I'm sending.

We'll do everything we can to make your transaction with Dr. Guite go as planned. Please be patient with us.

Anita

P.S. Valentine's Day is tomorrow, just in case you can help me get through it. If not, I understand.

A.B.


Right. I need to remove my brain and soak it in bleach, now.

[Koliedrus]

Ha! One letter and two Valentine e-cards for Anita:

Subject: I AM SORRY FOR NOT HAVE RESOPONDED TO YOUR MAIL SINCE.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are cool today, I alm really alone trying to fell the
valentines but I can't because I have no way around me to have that done
with. I saw all what you said and I am sorry for what you explain about
your parents. I am a black man and how do you fill and how will you fill
making friend with an African Guy that is in African here. I saw you
picture that you sent to me again and I fill that you snap it the same
day you snap the other one that you sent to me. I saw what you said that
makes you to cover your legs but it dosn't matter as far as it is what
you like I believe that I woun't be against it and you have to know
that for me being a christian does not mean that I woun't leave my life.
Tomorrow will be valentine's daay which I have no one to share it
together with ecept this way noiw that we are making it ans I wish that you
are close to me now because tomorrow is a special day to someone that
you love or that you are about to love. I really don't want to go further
to ask you about your parents which you have explained to me but all
what I will say is that may there soul rest in peace Amem.

I really can help you go through it but you should know that you are
too far from me but I still still you around me which I know that. I want
you to know that knowing you woun't have anyting to do with my business
with Dr. Guite or will it affect it at all. I believe that I am not a
baby which I know my self too well and at the first place how do you
expect me to go all the way to discuss my afair with you to your boss. I
can't try such a thing anita, I want you to have the trust in me. I will
be expecting your mail tomorrow so that I will hear from you because
tomorrow is a special day. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response
towards this mail.

Mathins.



Hoo, boy...

[Koliedrus]

See? The possible responses are endless when you're supplied with the material!

This was included with the second card:

Your friend Mathins Gure wants you to check out the following webpage, and included this message:

Hello Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I have waited to hear from your mail uptill now but I have not seen and that is why I decided to email you now so as to hear from you. I hope you are fine there which I know that you will be. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response towards this mail. I wish you happy valentine's day.


and snaps for the road....

[Koliedrus]

Check it out! I was being honest!

Yup, even with the smooch :D

Oh Mathins, you are so much fun!

[Koliedrus]

I'm still having trouble conjuring up a feeling of guilt. I'm working on it.

Let me see what I can drag out of him.

[Koliedrus]

Welp, I've got the emails, pics and links saved.

Anita sent Mathins a lot of long-winded tripe, some links to various music vids and a late-night "Sweet Dreams" message from the offices of LGI (she's on call 24 hours now).

She also resent the pic with the logo removed from her lap.



Subject: I REALLY GOT A SWEET DREAM ABOUT YOU YESTERDAY.

Dear Anita,

I hope you celabrated yesterday's valentine's day well without me. I
felt as if I was with you yesterday but there was nothing I can do that
is why I decided to let everything go just like that. I really know that
you are alright because I can't hide my feelings towards anything cause
I can say that I am begining to have feelings over you which makes me
think about you more as we goes on. I am happy to met a girl that is
carering of your type which I can't really let go just like that as far as
knowing you is concern. I don't want you to get burthered in my english
as you said in your mail because we alway use to using broken here and
in that case I was use to it and something it makes me made some
mistakes when writing or even when speaking. I really can say that I really
like you which I want to confess of that. I saw your picture which you
remove thhat thing that you used and covered it before but I can say
that is not too bad as far is it comes from you. I will get you some of my
pictures towards this way so that you will have alook on me. I also
needed more of your pictures if available with you but if not that will
comes later. I want you to tell me how you celebrated the lover's day
yesterday because I do not celebrated it bercause I have no one to do so
with because the girl that I was with got married this january which I
have no one by my side now. I really want to hear from your urgent
response towards this mail.

Your's,
Mathins.


Pics from him IN THE WORKS!

Now the question I ask myself, "can I get him to send money in lieu of flowers"?

[Billyman]

:D

[Koliedrus]

I took some advice from close friends:

"Pull out all the stops."

The dragon can swallow it's own tongue.

[Billyman]

Kol, sir, you are the devil I swear.

For some reason I love you for it. :D

[Koliedrus]

Subject: I NEEDED FOR OF YOUR PICTURES WITH SOME WRITE UPS TO MAKE ME FILL HAPPY.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your picture not youir mail since
yesterday which makes me not happy woith the whole idea. I thought that
at lis you should have emailed me yesterday but I stayed the whole
yesterday waiting to hear from you but you didn't and today you came just
to send a picture to me witrhout even giving me a note why. I realy need
to have oyur pictures even of this type but at list I should have heard
from you too. I know you are alright with your work. I am waiting to
hear from your urgent response towards this mail.

your's
Mathins.



Mathins,
I'm sorry for not responding sooner. We recieved this from Dr. Guite yesterday and have been trying to figure it out around the clock.

I need to see your smiling face! My LGI finance account is almost empty and the payroll people are telling me that we can only issue paychecks for another week unless we get those damned accounts open!

I don't want to go back to playing a guitar for money! Look where it got Jewel!

Oh god, Mathins... Everyone is so scared here!

Help me! I can't figure this out and no one else has the time!

My life is in your hands.

Nita

P.S. I would REALLY like to see the lips I want to kiss when all this works out.

AB

Dr. Leslie Gruite wrote:
Nita,

I'm attaching the information you requested for access to the primary account.

As you will see, the security measures I have put into place require more than a simple password that I can provide.

I am currently in transit between Location ZaphrodB and ZetaJ. That's a trip I'll have to tell you about if I make it home!

I'm sorry about the expense account locking up on you. Tell Ivana to hack away. I'm unable to gain access to the network under the circumstances so you may have to get another job until I return.

I'll contact you as soon as I can.

Passphrase: togo

LG



Encrypted attachment looks like this:

[Barbie]

EVIL EVIL EVIL! :D

[Koliedrus]

Today from Togo:


Subject: YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are alright today, I am worried as you said that you are
because I knew what you meant by saying of you problems especially the
expense of account locking up on you which I heard you said of it. I want
you to know that it will be okay and you most have the faith and the
believe that it will be alright. I want you to know that I am with you no
matter the situation at hand. I really don't know what to say or what
to do which I can only said I am sorry to hear ssuch things from you. I
will try as much as I can to send you my pictures which you will have
in your possesion so that you will see me face to face. I will do this
before the end of this week for you to have a look. I saw what Dr. Guite
sent to you which I really don't know what to, say about the whole
thing which I can say that I still have to wait for him till he gets back
which I believe that he wil be back soon. I really want to hear from you
so as to see the love in your eye's and in your words to and I really
don't want you to get worried of anything if not only to think of me. I
am waiting to hear from your urgent response towards this mail.

Your's
Mathins.



Anita's reply:


Mathins,

Thank you for the words of kindness and encouragement. This will sound really stupid but once everyone calmed down, we took a closer look at the file Dr. Guite sent.

The executable is a self decrypting archive. When I ran it and it asked for a passphrase, I called Ivana in for help. We immediately began searching high and low for someplace Leslie might keep a list of passwords.

In Leslie's safe he keeps a master key encased in a glass ampule filled with liquid nitrogen. In case of emergency, the amplule can be broken but the key begins to disintegrate within minutes. We broke it in front of his file cabinet and went to work searching his files. We tried plugging in different phrases for hours (I finally took an hour long nap on the couch) but there are so many possibilities we had to stop or go insane.

On a whim, I opened up his email again and just stared at it.

THERE IT WAS ALL ALONG!!! Right there in front of us the whole time!
passphrase: togo

Ivana is so mad at me now and who wouldn't be?

You can see it for yourself but the SDA file creates a picture (LG18.jpg) containing account access information. The bad news is that we have to have Leslie's voice to unlock the account so we're back to where we started; waiting for him to come home.

God, I need some time off. I'm thinking about turning operation over to Ivana for a couple of days, jumping on a company jet and just going somewhere. I think I'd like to see Canada. I've never been there. I'll let you know something first before I go. I'll take my laptop so I can keep in touch but I haven't decided on going yet.

I'm really excited about finally getting to see your picture! I can't wait! If you could send more than one, that would be fabulous! The more of you the better (if you know what I mean ;) )

You know what would be really neat? If I take this trip, I'll let you know where I'm staying. I know there are virtual flowers but it would be nice to get a call from the desk of my hotel, pick them up and take them to my room where I can touch and smell them. Oh well, it's just a thought.

Thank you again for cheering me up! I'll write again soon.

Nita


Interactivity Time!

Pictures are only part of the goal now. I'll hold off showing him Anita's schlong for as long as I can. Meanwhile, here's a chance to get this cocksucker to shell out some cash on flowers.

If he relents, one of you lucky people will receive the Lome' Bouquet. I'll have him send them to Anita at a hotel of your choice, you can pick them up (explaining the reverse-scam if necessary to the guy at the desk) snap pictures of the flowers and sniff the sweet aroma of satisfaction!

Fight fire with fire.

Who wants flowers :D

[Barbie]

For an EA, Anita is devulging far too much information about her boss. I'd have her fired.

What do you want me to write. I'm up for this! :)

[Koliedrus]

WOOT!

What I need is an agent in the field, if you will. Find a hotel within driving distance. PM me that hotel's contact info. I'll have Anita jet off and stay at the hotel you choose. Once Anita has her room I'll let Mathins know where she is. If all goes well, he'll send flowers, I'll alert you and you can drive over to pick them up.

I'll need a "package received" once you get them so I can tell him how lovely they are and shit like that.

Woops! No, Anita won't actually book a room. The hotel is just a location for the flowers to be sent.

[Koliedrus]

And yes, Anita is spewing confidential info. There's the hook ;)

If I can get the bastard to book a flight so that he can meet her with pilfered funds from LGI, so much the better!

Pick an island, in that case :)

One step at a time.

[Koliedrus]

There's also the thing about gaining enough trust to open an executable. It's an option.

[Barbie]

A hotel within driving distance from where I am now?

PM'd it is.

And ........................................................................go

[Koliedrus]

Our Anita is soon to find herself on a vacation to Canada and...

Flowers from me to you, Barbie. Indirect though they may be :)

Keep your fingers crossed... This part is up to Mathins.

[Barbie]

**crossed fingers**



may the force with you.


Canada is really fun.
'
I encourage you all to visit me.

I have lots of room (once the house is built...April possession)

[Koliedrus]

Mathins,


Ivana and I have been in each other's faces so much lately that we agreed that one of us should get away. To be honest, I don't think I could take another minute here

I've picked a place and the flight crew can have a jet ready tomorrow. I hope your flowers show up while I'm there. If not, that's ok. I'll understand.

I'm going here:

DELETED

I can be away from LGI for about four days without putting a dent in the expense account.

Ivana told me that this trip would do us both a lot of good. One of us needs to pay attention to Leslie.

I think Ivana is starting to notice that I'm attracted to you.

I'll take a nap while they get everything ready. I'm so sleepy. I can almost smell your flowers.

mmm

[Barbie]

I wonder if he'll send a teddy bear too? :D

EVIL EVIL EVIL

Does Mathin's know Anita's last name?

What if he calls ahead and checks up to see that Anita's *checked in*?

**crossed toes and eyes**

[Koliedrus]

If he calls, he's still hooked. The effort means that he's spending time and money to confirm reservations for a contrived person instead of scamming.

Mathins gets Anita's last name with every response.

"Biggun, Anita"

[sauron]

Originally posted by Koliedrus
And yes, Anita is spewing confidential info. There's the hook ;)

If I can get the bastard to book a flight so that he can meet her with pilfered funds from LGI, so much the better!

Pick an island, in that case :)

One step at a time.

Please do realise that it is one thing to play with these people whilst hidden behind the online veil of anonymity - it's something completely different once you 1) start involving others, and 2) start having non-virtual interactions...

There have been a number (>2) of reported incidents where people were killed whilst dealing with the wrong group of 419 scammers...

- d.

[Barbie]

well, that scared me enough to back up and take a look...

419? What does that mean?

[sauron]

Originally posted by Barbie
well, that scared me enough to back up and take a look...

419? What does that mean?

It's the nick name for the "I have lots of money I need to move offshore, and you get a cut if you help me" scams.

http://www.419fraud.com/

- d.

[Koliedrus]

Duly noted although I can't see how picking up flowers at the front desk of a hotel as particularly life-threatening.

But since there's a fear-factor involved, the clerks at the front desk can keep the flowers if no one wants to pick them up.

If memory serves, the deaths involved suckers who sent money, learned that they were scammed and flew over there to get their money back.

Notice, please, that I encourage no one to contact this fuckstick themselves. I'm handling that. At best I only ask for help with pics and dialogue to be send by me. I seriously doubt any flowers will actually be sent.

Anita (he now calls her "Honey") will be hopping a flight at 5am EST. I should probably send some vacation photos if anyone cares to help me search for some. Finding pics of someone who looks like Anita is also a bonus.

[Koliedrus]

Ok, I've written to the hotel explaining why they might be getting flowers for Anita and that someone may pick them up but if not to keep them with my compliments.

Fair enough?

[Koliedrus]

I forgot to include the details.

Feel the love....



Subject: God will MAKE A WAY FOR YOU BECAUSE THIS PLACE MIGHT BE MEANT ..

Dear Honey,

I can see what you are going through which I am begining to fill about it but I know that you will over come it. I really want to know now if it is Leslie that got lace for you or is that you got it by your self. I will like to know also how ivana got to know. I am not worried of anything at all becuse if we get close much to each othe why woun't he know but I don't know ho it might afecyt you that's what I am thinking off. I really fill like vbeig with you but I know that soner we will as long as we are together. I want to know your programme over your new job so that I wil be rest assured. I am looking fowards to hear from your urgent response towards this mail.

Your's partner,
Mathins


"Honey"?! Alright, then...


Sweetie,
I'm not sure what you mean by "lace". Do you mean the "place" where I'll be staying?

One of our best clients operates out of someplace deleted so my vacation will actually be a "business trip". That way we can write it off as a business expense.

Good news! We gained access to one of the smaller secondary accounts so we can keep LGI running business-as-usual for another six months without having to worry! I got the news to Leslie and he wrote back that he was joking when he said I should look for another job. I'm too happy to be mad at his strange sense of humour. He also told me that the trip is not only a great idea, he may want me to visit some more of our clients soon but he didn't say where.

As for Ivana, we have the same security clearance and since we're twins we tell each other pretty much everything without having to worry about our secrets getting out so don't worry.

I'll be leaving for someplace deleted in a little over 15 hours but as I said I'll be in touch. If you want to send me those flowers you can use something like www.1800flowers.com and have them sent to:

Anita Biggun
C.O. Blah yadda thing deleted

The front desk will call me when they arrive. I'll see about taking some pictures for you while I'm there. I'll probably be coming home on Sunday but I haven't decided yet.

Well, baby, I need to finish up some things before I leave and I still haven't packed so I need to get busy. I'll write soon. I hope I answered your questions but if I missed something, let me know.

Yours,
Anita


... leavin' on a jet-plane
Hmmm hmmm duh la la laa la la....

[Billyman]

This is the best movie I've ever seen!

[Koliedrus]

To the hotel:



Subject: If flowers arrive for me...

Hi,
You can probably guess that my real name isn't Anita Biggun. Here's my story:

If you've never heard about Nigerian 419 scams, they're (among other things) emails from people (mainly West African but not always) trying to sell themselves as account managers of some non-existant bank or other asking for help in moving large sums of money offshore.

After learning that people actually fall for that stuff to the tune of thousands of dollars in fictional processing fees or bribes to officials in order to free up these equally fictional accounts, I received one myself and decided to a practice known as "scam-baiting". Basically, scam-baiting involves faking interest and keeping the scammer so occupied that they don't have time to search for other victims.

Over the last few weeks, I've kept this particular scammer tied up with a host of my own fictional characters (I'm writing from the account of one with whom he's become infatuated).

The reason I'm writing is that this fictional character is taking a fictional vacation, will be "staying at your hotel" and there's a destinct possibility that she may receive flowers from him while she's there.

So, if a bouquet for Anita Biggun arrives at your front desk, accept them with my compliments and smile knowing that a scammer has been scammed by one of the good guys.

I know of a person in someplace who is thinking about stopping by and picking them up should they arrive. That's fine by me.

I'm hoping to eventually gather enough information about this scammer to turn over to authorities. He is slated to take his own mugshot for me :D

Thank you in advance for your understanding. Feel free to contact me via this address if you'd like to know more about this "Togo Tango".

Sincerely,

Not Really Anita B.

[Barbie]

I have a good contact / friend at the [B] someplace deleted [B] and I'll give her a call to see if they arrived. I'll advise of the note you sent above as she's probably the one who recieved it.

**:D**

[Koliedrus]

What the.....

"I can't send flowers because I, um, have..... MALARIA! Yeah, that's the ticket. Malaria."



Subject: I AM SICK HONEY.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I am sorry for not have emailed you since
yesterday. I am sick which makes me not to have goting to you. I am not
feeling well which DR sai_d that it is malaria but I am geting better as
of today. I just want to get to you because I needed to email you for
you to hear from you. I love you anita and pray for me to get well so
that we can talk better but at the same time still sending me mails
because I might be again tomorrow to mail you. I am waiting to hear from
you.

Your's
Mathins.

I should have Anita's jet crash or something. The motherfucker snubbed her! Let's see... sickly-sweet seems to work.

I may seek therapy after this is done.

[Barbie]

malaria my ass

[Koliedrus]

Gah!

Mathins,

How strange that you and I are sick at the same time! I think mine is just flight sickness or something I ate before I left. It could be that all the hectic activity that's been going on recently.

I'll take a shot at saying a prayer for you but He doesn't usually answer me. God and I have issues. We haven't spoken since my parents died but for you, I'll make an acception.

My client met me at the airport on schedule and I'm settled into my room. It's absolutely beautiful! I didn't pack my tripod but I took a picture of my bed for you. That's where I'll be after I send this.

Tomorrow, I'll head for the water park downstairs and hope that I don't get too excited about being there. Sometimes people look at me strange when I'm arroused. I tend to blush a lot.

I'm off to sleep and into dreams.

I feel better already.

Don't forget my pictures and flowers, sweetie. I'm leaving on Sunday.

When I curl up in the sheets, I'll take your illness with me and together we will make it go away.

Sleep well,

Anita

[Barbie]

Hey, if that is down the street from me, I'm going there for the rest of the weekend. CHECK OUT THAT SOAKER TUB.

The view from the someplace deleted isn't that great.

But the view from the Calgary Tower is.

Just an FYI

[Koliedrus]

I meantioned the water park (http://www.sheraton-calgary.com/panoramas/oasiswaterpark/poolupper/poolupperlevel.HTM) for a reason.

Hell yeah! Spend a day!

[Barbie]

West Edmonton Mall is better. :)

Anita should do a "day trip" there or drive up for a night.

The waterpark at West Edm Mall ROCKS!!

[Koliedrus]

Plan her trip!

Here's the latest:From: Leslie Guite
Subject: Level 3

Nita,

Update.

Relax during much needed rest. Secure on this end. Proud of your work. Mr. Gure is green. This message CC to him.

Continue with current agenda. Secure objective and prepare for departure within 5 days. Ivana is green for access. Accounts open. Allow priority contact ONLY.

Alert flight crew: Prep For Departure, Code 4

Status 3 until otherwise notified.

LG



Subject: Re: Level 3

Leslie,


I understand. Be advised that Mathins has malaria so he's not feeling well right now. Neither am I! I think the flight crew needs to check the dates on the meals they serve. I've been sick all day!

I'll let Ivana know what's going on.

Level 3 procedure in place. Now leave me alone so I can get some sleep, you big pain!

Come back safe!

Nita



Just to let Mathins know that everytning is ok.

So, what do I need to do to get you guys involved so I don't end up talking to myself?

Write to Anita Biggun @ Nanyapop-anitab@yahoo.com with suggesstions.

[Koliedrus]

Is this the place> http://www.westedmall.com/

God forbid we should mislead a man with malaria *gasp*!

[Barbie]

That's it man! :)

I recommend the shopping, the waterpark, the ice skatig, the fantasy hotel, bourbon street...

hmmmmmm party!

[Koliedrus]

Ok. Let's assume that that Anita found the wet bar before anyone gets wadded undergarments.

And there's the thing about my faulty gland...


Subject: Before I Sleep

Sweets,

I hope you're feeling better than I do. My stomach is sore from throwing up.

Did you get Leslie's email? It looks like he's back to the shadows again.

I'm sick and alone but I'm feeling a lot better.

Our client here? She's a rocket scientist!!! Or maybe she's a marine biologist. Something like that. Anyway she's really smart and she called me a little while ago to invite me on a shopping trip!

Can you stand up and say "Hell Yeah"?! WWWOooo!
I'm all over THAT!

Leslie gave us the green light so I'm going for it!
Waterpark, here I come!!!!
Next stop.....

I don't know!

http://www.westedmall.com/


That mall looks kick-ass!

Shit. Now I envy Anita.

I have no idea what she will do tomorrow.

[Barbie]

Bourbon street. :)

[Koliedrus]

To: "Biggun, Anita (LG Industries)"
Subject: I WANT TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE WELL.


Dear Anta,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and the content well
noted. I am sorry that you are sick the way I do which kept me worried
because we can't sick at the same time because if both of us got sick who
will fill the each other. I want you to know that my love is growing in
you which I know that it is the same in you other there. I want you to
know that I am taking my time to come up openly to tell you this but I
do have nothing to hide of you since I will still tell you this at the
end of the day. I saw what Leslie wrote which I will get back to him
when I finish writing you now. I am happy that he is back or that is is
about to round up what he went thre for which I know that my business
with him will start soon or will proceed soon so that we will get it
rounded up. Although I am happy to know you as a person because since I
know you my life have started changing because I thought of you each the
and that is why I decided to check my box now if not I never propose
checking it today because of my health.

I want you to know also that I do go through you picture each day which
makes me to be happy and I promise you that I will,love you more as
soon as we get to each other closer. As I am here I am not the kind of
person that easily loved someone but I did it to you easilly because I saw
the love which I have been looking foward for. I hope your sickness is
geting better and better which I will also like to know the possition
of is now with you. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response.

Your's
Mathins.



Piss off. Anita is busy enjoying some time for, uh, herself?

Yeah. Like that. Go HAVE your "malaria", Mr. No-Flower-Sending-Sack-O-Shit! Hmmph!


To: "Leslie Guite"
Subject: THE LEVEL 3 AS YOU DO SAY WAS NOT WELL CLEAR TO ME.



Dear Leslie,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail although the content
was not well understood well. I want you to know that I have been
communicating to your worker anita as you directed her to do which she have
been doing and I am happy over that. I really want to know the situation
of thing so that I will know what next to do because we can't keep on
waiting because of the nature of the business that I proposed to you
which demands urgent attention. I am happy to see your mail which I want
us to proceed and have this transaction finalize for the best interest
of both of us. I want you to explain to me now how you really wanted it
or that you still have some time to spend on your travel. I am waiting
to hear from your urgent response towards this mail so that I will be
rest assured.

Your's partner,
Gure.


Considering that most of you guys have trouble decyphering the stuff I write, I can understand his confusion.

I think Anita might just throw him a guilt trip later. The hard part about that will be delving into past relationships for material.

Maybe I won't need therapy after all! This is therapy! Kinda.

[Koliedrus]

Ok. Leslie sent an email to Mathins (CC Anita)


-----BEGIN SIGNED MESSAGE-----
Hash: SHA7
Mr. Gure,
Anita or Ivana will attempt to clarify my situation. Each are equally
trusted.
Be advised that my opportunities for contact are brief at present.
-----BEGIN SIGNATURE-----
iQA/AwUBQDeJ8B9O82HJVdGTEQLLcCbB0BJNef/WyczpVAYsI+wlQgfracAnjJ2
9bQ91TAmoQQL5Y87TYfL/Ss1
=DU0z
-----END SIGNATURE-----



Dammit! All the years I've snubbed soap operas... The training I've missed!

Oh well. Too late for that. Time to improvise.

To: "Leslie Guite"
Subject: I WILL BE KEEPING INTOUGH WITH IVANA AND ANITA TILL YOU ARE BACK.


Dear Leslie,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and I heard all what
you said. I will advise you to know that this transaction is very very
importnat to me which means alot to me and I will also advise that which
ever way it goes just know it that I will be waiting to hear from your
urgent response so that we will have this transaction done together. I
am waiting.

Gure.

Enter, Ivana (drumroll, please....)

[Barbie]

Now you're going to be TWO men?

[Koliedrus]

No no. I'm one man and a set of twins; one of which (at least) is a she-male.

Keep up!

[Koliedrus]

I'm now using color coding as part of my email management routine.

And a one and a two and a...

Mathins,

Before I get started I want to know how you're feeling. I don't know much about malaria aside from the fact that it's an infectious disease transmitted by the bite of mosquitoes infected with the malaria-causing parasite. After being bitten by an infected mosquito, the parasite infects human liver and red blood cells. Most malaria infections have flulike symptoms (such as high fever, chills, muscle pain, diarrhea) that come and go in cycles as the disease progresses. One type of malaria may cause more serious problems, including heart, lung, kidney, or brain damage and possibly death.

Get well soon.

I've had such a blast today! I didn't even check into my room until an hour ago and I'll be heading out again in about 20 minutes so I need to write quick.

I was really hoping that I'd have a picture of you by now. I know it sounds silly but since I've sent so many to you and haven't gotten even one back... Well, it just makes me wonder. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you're attracted to me and all but it's hard for the feeling to go the other way if I can't see where it's going. Know what I mean?

Here I go again. My ride's here.

I'll try to write tomorrow.

Get well, Mathins!

Nita


Dear Anita,

I hope you celebrated the weekend very well, I am alright as on now
because I have taking proper cere of my self towards the weekend which
makes me to fill well now. I want you talso to know that malaria is a
sickness that is being transmitted by mosquitoes which you know and my is
just malaria wxhich comes and go if you take proper treatment of it. I
am sound and healthy now which I am not as of last week. I am happy of
your concern about my health which makes me to fill happy over over. I
want you to know that I woun't fail to send you my picture this week and
what makes you not to have benn with my picture till date is because I
am not use to snaping pictures coupled with the scanning machine that I
normally use that got spoiled but I will try and do something about it
this time. I want you also to tell me about you movement this time
because your programme now is not well cleared to me and I will like you to
know that I got a mail from your Ivana telling me that Mr Leslie
directed him to get to me so as to proceed with me but I want to email him
now so as to let him know that it woun't be possible to go on with him
hence it is not our initial plan because I will decide to wait till Mr
Leslie is back and if I waited for too long I can now call it a quite
with him. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response.

Your's partner,
Gure.


Dear ivana,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and the content well
understood. I Really want you to know that I saw your mail but I have
thought over it it is not necessary to start this transaction with you or
to proceed with you over this transaction because it is cinfidential
and there is no way I will get it done with you hence I am already doing
it with Mr Leslie. All what I can say is that if I should wait for Mr
Leslie for some time now and he fail to have this transaction finalize
with me I will look for someone elfe that I will have as my partner so
that we will done it together. I am saying this because this transaction
is not something that someone that can move in expecially when you do
not know much about it. I am sorry to tell you this but I prefer being
straight fowards than going round and round. I happens to know that you
are a brother to Anita which happens to be a friend and all what I am
planning for now is to go close to her and have her a someone to me. I
hope this will not sound to you as funny or anoying. I am waiting to
hear from more of you and directives towards this mail.

Your's sincerely,
Gure.


Mr. Gure

Your message received and understood.

Be advised that my function in this matter is only that of a messenger. Dr. Guite fully understands your need to perform your transaction in a timely manner. His current venture is of utmost importance and, if successful, stands to greatly increase the operating capital of LGI.

Because of this, he may not be able to assist you within the timeframe you have outlined although there is a slight chance that the final details of the current project might be finalized sooner than expected.

On behalf of Dr. Guite, I am authorized to express his understanding should you decide to seek a partner with whom your project might conclude more swiftly.

On a more personal note, it appears as though my sibling has become quite fond of you and wishes to continue correspondence regardless of the status of your business relationship with Dr. Guite. I urge you, however, to treat Anita's heart gently as it is still going through a healing process. You're compliance is strongly recommended.

Feel free to contact me regarding either of these two matters.

Sincerely,

Ivana B.

Mathins,

I'm so glad to hear that you're feeling better! I was really beginning to worry!

My weekend was absolutely wonderful once I stopped feeling so sick but now I'm simply exhausted from all the activity. I'm actually kind of glad to be on my way home (we're in the air as I write this and should be landing in less than two hours),

Ivana tells me that your business with Leslie might not work out as you two had planned. I'm really sorry to hear that but you know Leslie. He knows how to put first-things-first and he's really on to something big right now. I hope this doesn't mean you and I have to stop sharing time together even if it's from so far away. I'm really looking forward to getting your pictures and trading portions of our lives.

Oh and just in case you sent flowers after I left, the hotel can have them delivered to me at home.

You know, I think it would be really nice to see a letter from you written in something other than English. Could you do that for me? I'm not even sure what language you normally speak. Maybe you could give me some lessons :)

Oh yeah... Ivana said that my ex-boyfriend left a note on my car at LGI but doesn't know what it says. It's still sealed in an envelope. He didn't know anything about my trip and probably thought I was in the office. No matter what it says, I don't want anything to do with him. He broke my heart one too many times. I'm a forgiving person and I realize that everyone has their little secrets but when I found out he was cheating on me, I stopped forgiving him. Anyway, that's all in the past so don't worry about him. I just wanted you to know what's going on.

I'm going to take a short nap while I can. It'll probably take me two days just to unpack! I went just a little crazy shopping.

Write soon! I'll answer as quickly as I can but don't worry if it takes a while. I don't officially have to be back to work until wednesday morning so I'll probably kick back an rest. Sounds silly after just getting back from vacation, doesn't it?

Soon,

Nita


Subject: I AM WITH YOU ANITA WHICH FOR SURE I WILL SEND YOU MY PICTURE..






Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and the conten well
noted. I want you to know that I am besides you which makes me to fill
about you every time. YOu mentioned of something like me telling you the
other language that I speak which if I happens to tell you now, I don't
think that you will know it because you are not from west Africa. I
will also like to know the reason why I wanted to know the language that I
speak or is it that the english that we are writing with is not good
enough for you or is it something else. I heard what you Ivana said about
MR Leslie concerning out transaction but I still have the believe that
he will be back soon because my plan is to wait and if I didn't see him
I will now look for someone elfe to have it done with me. I will also
like you to get me some of you sweet pictures even the one's that you
snap in the plane oe out side it.I am waiting to hear from your urgent
response.

Your's
Mathins.




Silly Mathins ;)

No, I understand your English just fine. I just thought it would be nice to share something from you from your childhood, heart and mind. I don't mind if I can't understand it.

I haven't told you about Jared and his antics with camera's but we tolerate him almost like a loveable puppy.

Jared took some photos during the trip and sent them to me. He was just sitting there on the other side of the cabin, watching me take notes. I didn't even consider that he was taking my picture!

He gave me several but Ivana and I need to go through them to make sure we're not breaking any rules (company or personal) if I send them to you. Ivana will help me decide on what to edit and/or crop.

So, anyway, here are a couple that I can send right now!

This is me coming back from "vacation". Jared caught me writing notes in my diary. The captain (I can't remember his name) came back to check on me.

I had my hair done. What do you think?

Anita

[Barbie]

she looks more respectable now.

[Koliedrus]

I went through a lot of this

http://www.smithsonianeducation.org/images/global/optional_images/si_ci_exchange_thumbs.jpg

after reading this:

Subject: I AM WITH YOU WHICH I REALLY WANT YOU TO KNOW.


Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and I am happy to hear
from you. I really want to know where you are coming from which you
told me and I saw ithe pictures that you sent to me. I really needed to
know because you told me that you will be travellig but never mentioned
of Mr leslie in it but you wrote me and tome me of him which makes me to
fil confuse over the whole idea. I saw the pictures that you sent to me
and I am in love with them which I wil like you to send down the ones
that you told me off or you mentioned about. It looks as if you are
about to resume your work which I woill also like to know the arrangement
ofor now because of what you told me about what Mr Leslie told you off
or are you still going to work with him, please clarify me.

I saw the French that you wrote to me which I will also like to know if
you speak french or is it that you used a translator to do that. I love
you which you know because I can't hide it again and I fill that I am
matured enough to express my feelings to whom ever I want to know but
the fact remains this way? you do. I saw all the pictures that you snaped
in the plane hich I sdaw someone close to you and I will like to kno
whom he is, is he Ivana or someone elfe. I will also like to know the
same person that you keep on mentioning to me which you called his name as
Jared. I am worried of what you just told me because this love that we
are talking about is very difficult to blake which makes me to fill
somehow over your position now with your else boy friend. I want you to
put me clear over that because I can't keep on trying to make things
works out betwen both of us ae at the end of it all to tell me a different
thing. I want you to state to me your love with your else boy friend
cause you just told ng back which I might not know what next to happen.
You know that I am begining to lve you more which I can no longer hide
it again. I am waiting to hear from your urgent response towards this
mail.

Your's Darling,
Mathins.


Obviously can't grasp much more than nekkid pics of Anita.

Ok. It's a task to explain the situation to him again but what the hell. Now isn't the best place in time to make him lose his lunch.



Mathins,

Wow! It looks like I've really confused you. I'll try to answer you without gabbing so much.

1. Leslie joked when he told me that I should get another job but I didn't know that he was joking at the time.

2. I'll be working at LGI for a long time to come.

3. The guy sitting next to me in the picture inside the jet is the jet's pilot. I don't know his name.

4. Jared is not my ex-boyfriend. He's Leslie's nephew. He's the one that took the pictures. Jared is working his way up at LGI as an apprentice. He went on the trip to make sure that we actually got some work done so we could write it off as a business expense.

5. Jared always has a camera with him. Photography is his hobby.

6. Yes, I used a translator to write in French. I forgot most of my French after I graduated from school. The translator was easier than digging through old note, dictionaries and memories. I was also half-way through a bottle of wine when I wrote it.

7. The pictures from before. Well, I was drunk when they were taken. I'm embarassed to even look at them now so I think I'll keep them locked away for now.

8. My ex-boyfriend was a liar and a cheat. I don't want anything to do with him.

9. I'm not sure if my heart is ready to fall in love yet. Time doesn't always heal all wounds. Sometimes wounds kill. I just hope that my ex-boyfriend hasn't killed my ability to love.

10. I'm still waiting for your picture but I don't want to rush you.

I hope that's easier to understand than my usual rambling! I have a way of either talking someone's ear off or sitting silently with my thoughts. Ivana used to be the same way but now that he's taking his medication regularly he's like a machine once he gets started on something.

Remember when Ivana came back from assignment? Of course you do! Silly me. That was right before I sent you the first pictures. Well, Ivana knew when he was coming home before I did and had the celebration planned. There was a problem, though. He can't have alcohol in his system while he's on his medication so he stopped taking his medicine a week before he came home. He did that just so we could share a glass of wine.

It got a little out of hand. That's one reason I covered my lap with the company logo.

I'm rambling again! I'll stop now and send this off to you. But....

I can show you a picture that Jared took of me and Dr. Guite at work! Sorry that it only shows the back of Leslie's head but Ivana wouldn't declassify anything that shows his face.

Write soon,

Nita

Hey, he chose Ivana's gender, not me!

A sample of the obligatory picture is attached.

I'm sparing you the nuances like, yes, music vids. And once MJ issues a new press release it should show up in his primay inbox.

[Koliedrus]

Originally posted by Barbie
she looks more respectable now.

OOOOHHHHHH Bubba....

Let me show you what "respectable" means in this context.

This just in:

Subject: I CARES.



Dear Anita,

I heard all what you said which makes me fill at rest now. I happens to
understood that you are a nice girl with the way you are anwering me
questions and in that case it looks as if you will be a nice house wife.
I am sorry to say this if it might not impress you but I have to say it
because I am happy with you and with your way cause my friend and one
of my cousin ones told me that a white girl do not have respect for her
housband cause she fill that everyone is the same in the family nothing
like a man of the house or what ever. I have to tell you this because
you see in Africa here our tradition is quite different from your own
there which makes it to be a little difficult to some girls over there
but I saw nothing wrong in it because I have seen a lot of my brothers
married to a white lady's there which the really together till date and I
saw nothing wrong in anything with them at all.

I have to tell you this because I fill that it is nice to let you know
which you have to know. I am with you and I will be with you which I
still have to let you knwo the more we goes. I am happy that your boss
was joking on what he told you before which kept we woundering about how
you are going to do or to adjust when you go there. I am waiting to
hear from your urgent response.

Your's
Mathins.

I cracked my knuckles. I wonder what triggers that...

[Koliedrus]

Mathins,

I'm so relieved! I thought I was about to lose something precious again. My mind was full of fire-ants, rabid squirrels and mangled parents...

I want you to know why I chose French. I've been trying to learn more about Togo.

Languages: French (official and the language of commerce), Ewe and Mina (the two major African languages in the south), Kabye (sometimes spelled Kabiye) and Dagomba (the two major African languages in the north)

I was hoping that one of those languages is yours. I know it's silly of me but to see something written by you in a language you love might make me feel...

Comfrotable.

I can't hear your voice but to read words from you that come more naturally than French or English...

It's stupid but it would make me feel closer to you.

Don't worry about it.... Unless you really want to.

I need to force myself to go to sleep so I can be ready for work in the morning. I'll write as soon as I can.

Nita

[Koliedrus]

Subject: I WILL EXPLAIN TO YOU LATER.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your mail and the content well
understood. I will like you to know that I heard all what you said about
Togo which makes me fill at hme that you happns to know about my
country. I am a happy man and I will like you to know that I it is nice for
you taking your time just to know about me. I have some things to tell
you about my self and things around me which I have no time to do that
right away mayby when I am less busy in the night today I will get you
known those things. I really want you to hear from me that is why I
decided to email you. I am waiting to hear from you.

Your'
Mathins.


That sound promising...

Mathins,

My first day back to work but it's not as hectic as I thought it would be. Ivana kept everything running smoothly while I was away. There are only a couple of major issues that need to be dealt with. We should have them resolved before long, though. We've organized and prioritized all morning so we can take care of them rapidly.

That is, after we have some lunch. Jared was nice enough to bring us sandwiches so we could eat in our offices. I have to honest, though; I prefer Quiznos.

I'm really looking forward to reading your next message! I can only hope that you'll tell me about your life and that there's a picture of you! Don't worry if you can't send a picture yet. I know you're having problems with your scanner. I'll wait :)

I just want you to know that I may not have time to reply until I get home. Probably in another 9 hours or so by the looks of things,

Ivana is looking over some of Jared's pictures. I've asked him to declassify some of them so I can send them to you. He has a busy schedule so be patient with him.

Here they come again. "Important" messages needing attention. So much for lunch!

Write when you can. Write from your heart.

With great anticipation,

Nita


Now comes more waiting...

[Koliedrus]

Subject: I AM SORRY TO LIE TO YOU.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your maail a,nd the content well
understood. I promised to send my pictures to you as soon as the a
ready to send donw to you. I know also that it is my responsibility to do
that and that is why I will do all I can to see that you have a look at
me. I have signed to be with you and as list for now to get close to
you so that we will get to know our self better. Actually I grown up in
Ghana the country close to my own and I schooled there which after my
education and I now decided to colme back home which makes it difficult
to understand my village language very well although I do speak it a
little. I know that you really want to know about me very well but you
should know that what I have already told you is the truth and nothing
more than that and you should know that with time I will explain more to
you. I have told you a little about my family which I told you that I
got married about four years back and I lost my wife two years ago which
makes I really don't want to explain. I loved her alot but there is no
way I can see her again but I know that God knows the reason. I have to
confess to you now that the initial age that I told you is not my which
I was wrong on it because I felt that if I happens to tell you about my
age you will not acept me but as things stands now I have to let you
know. I am 36years old which I formerly toild you 42 but I want you to
forgive me for the which I knoiw that you will do. I am looking foward to
hear from your mail.

Your's
Mathins





FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFuck!

I opened up his chest to crush his heart and now.... I can't!!!!

Son of a BITCH!!!

This will take some thought...

[Billyman]

Kol, you’ve become emotional attached to this fucknut.

You’re becoming lost in why you started what you started.

Don’t fall into this guys arms weeping “I’m sorry”.

[Koliedrus]

Whew! Thanks Billy! I needed that noggin-slap! :)

Back to the dissection...
I don't know what to say.

I've known that you've had secrets all along.

I haven't said anything to Leslie or Ivana but I already know that "Mathins" isn't your name. Shhhhh. I have my ways ;)

Tell me about your wife. Let me meet her through you.

Nita



P.S. You're right. I forgive you. Keep that in mind.

It's starting to look like Anita's jet will crash.

You tell me how you want this to end.

[Barbie]

That would be awesome!~

[Koliedrus]

Subject: WHY CANT YOU BE HAPPY WITH ME.


Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I received your maila and I alm happy for
the forgiveness that you said off which kept me worried since yesterday
that I told you of it. I have not been telling you lies all olong which
you should know that I have reasons for doing what I just did. You
should know that I love you and if not I wouldn't have goting to this
lenght with you. I don't want it to get you worried off because I have my
reason which you should know that I got to know you through Mr Leslie
that I proposed a business with an I was afraid at the first place of
having an afair with you but I got to know now that it will definitely
works out with us. I am happy as you are keeping secrets which I really
found happy over as you are dear to me which I realize which you do too. I
was leaved with a girl that I loved for two years and we are about to
have our weeding ceremony the next year before she died about 8months
before our weeding although I have not heard much done on her head as we
do here before a girl can be called your wife but we still leave
together as husband and wife. My name is mathins and I can say to you that I
didn't lied to you over the name that I told you since I have turned to
a lier. I am confuse because it seens that you are no longer happy
because it have not been you this way. I am waiting to hear from you and to
see some of your pictures that will makes me fill at happy with you.

Your's Darling.
Mathins.


Okie dokie. Time for some pressure.




You,

I have to admit that I've been feeling edgy recently. I think it might be because of the note my ex-boyfriend left on my car. Two pages of confessions. He was trying to get me back. Well, that's just tough shit for him! He decided to be honest with me after it was too late. He can rot in Hell for all I care!

Right after I shredded his letter, I was in my office writing an email to you when Ivana walked in. He asked me if I was busy. I told him that I was about to send you a message.

He stood there with no _expression while I typed and then suddenly said that I should ask you if you're related to Buba Gure or Kondo Yao.

He looked at me like he knew I was about to get bad news and then went off to his lab. He still hasn't said anything else about it.

So, I stopped writing and opened up one of your emails. I don't usually look at the headers but Ivana had a look in his eye that had me worried.

I saw your IP address and ran a search on it. It gave me this:

Kondo Yao

(detals available with minimal effort by you)

My ex-boyfriend told me the truth about himself after it was too late for me to forgive him.
I don't want that to happen to us.

Sweetie, I realize that you needed to use a fake name with Leslie. There's a lot of money at stake in your dealings with him and it's not entirely legal. I would do the same if I were in your shoes. The thing is that Leslie is already rich. He really doesn't need any more money.

I've been thinking that maybe I could take a jet to Togo and bring you here! When I brought it up to Ivana he said, "you've tapped into a valuable resource, Nita. Don't repeat the mistakes of your past."

I know my brother. He doesn't want to see my heart broken again.

So Truth is my salvation. I can have a jet on the tarmac but I need to know YOU before I say, "prepare for departure".

Let me know if you could work in a place like this (attached picture) before you answer me.

Let me know if I can bring you Home.

Nita


Here we go. Nita is about to break a shitload of rules and head for Togo.

You can guess the planned result.

[Koliedrus]

Whoops! Forgot the pic.

[Barbie]

what movie are you pulling these from?

If Anita is in a plane crash, how with Mathin's know? There better be a plane that goes missing so that if he DOES check the internet, there is a related story.

Did I miss something? When did you start refering to Ivana as HE?

[Koliedrus]

Mathins chose Ivana's gender. I went with the flow.

The rest is still up for artistic contribution.

[Koliedrus]

Subject: I AM FOR YOU WHICH I PROMISE A GOOD STAY.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine today, I am happy to meet a girl like you that
understands the way things should be no matter what is the case. All I want
you to diviate from is listening from people or taking advise from
people expecially what is beetwen us because it is meant to be we will have
it done without much delay. I am not related to buba neither do I no
him from any where or even the other person that you told me off. I can't
lie to you and I believe that time has come for us to have
understanding beetwen us so that things will worked out for us. You should know
that no bidy will be offered something good that he or she woun't acept
taking and in that case you should know that I am being paid as a banker
$200 monthly which wasn't in any way waht I needed to be what I wish to
be. Do you believe that I Will brake your heart. I am waiting to hear
from your urgent response towards this mail.

Your's sincerely,
Mathins.






We'll talk again after you've sent me your picture.

No more pictures or anything else until you let me know who you really are.

I won't be broken again.

Nita




Just to pound the nail I sent this:


http://launch.yahoo.com/video/default.asp?vid=1090529

Oh yeah. The movie is Puppet Masters. Fitting?

Ivana will let Mathins know when something happens to Nita.

This scam began with a plane crash.

What the hell. Sounds poetic to me.

[Koliedrus]

Anita's jet is in the air.

I'll miss her.

Rest well, my manufactured contrivance.

[Barbie]

OH MY GOD!

[Koliedrus]

Suffice it to say that there are emails that I haven't posted.

Here's Anita:

Mathins,

It's so quiet up here. The sound of the jet's engines aren't loud enough to drown my thoughts of Nocky and Podie.

I haven't been able to sleep soundly since they were put down. Now I'm on my way back to the place where it all started. I'm afraid to close my eyes. The nightmares are too real to me.

Can't write more. Bumpy ride.
NB

We won't hear from her again.

[Barbie]

Good bi Anita

Please post what Mathins' has to say...in time, in time. :)

[Koliedrus]

Mathins just bought Anita a little more time. There's always the return trip...

Subject: I AM HAPPY TO SENT YOU MY PICTURE.

Dear Anita,

I hope you are nice today, I heard all what you said which I Most
confess that I forgot that youy told me something about your journey which I
remembered today when I saw your mail. I wish you a good journey which
I Know that you will go and come back without no problem. I have seen
that you have beginning to loose hope on me which I Most confees has
kept me thinking much why it should have been that way. I really know that
you do know that I love you which I Really have to say it no matter
what ever you might though of me or people might have told you off our
friendship. I have to send to you my picture just you sure you true love.
I am waiting to hear from your urgent response towards this mail. I
wish you save journey.

Your's Darling,
Mathins.




Now, my thinking is that the picture really is of him but there's no way to be sure. After all, I don't look anything like EITHER of the Anita's. Wouldn't he have been better off sending one of "himself" in a suit in his office?

I'll hint at having him take more.

Boys and girls, meet "Mathins Gure"....

[Koliedrus]

This was the best I could do under the circumstances. I used pink letter and the smoochie-lips background if that's of any relevance:

Mathins!

I can't even begin to tell you how happy I am to finally see you! You're even more handsome than I imagined! I'm so glad you were finally able to get your picture to me! Does this mean you can send more? Please?

You were looking away from the camera and you didn't smile for me. If it took a lot of work to get that one to me, please don't worry too much about sending more unless it's not too much trouble. You and I are both busy people so I understand, baby. Wow!!!

Well, now that I've got a little time I'll catch you up on what I've been doing.

When I wrote to you last time from the jet we were trying to get around a storm that was right between LGI and Omicron. All that bouncing around made me air-sick. That's why I couldn't write more to you. You'd think that after all the flying I have to do I'd be used to it by now.

I didn't want to get sick like I did last time so I didn't have anything to eat before the flight or while we were in the air. It helped a little. I kept my eyes closed during the helicopter shuttle from the landing strip to Omicron.

After I got settled into my room I was led on an inspection tour by the Research Director and his staff. They weren't quite prepared for my visit so I think I'll go on a tour of my own without telling them about it. I have to wade through a lot of reports first. The directory gave me so much material to review that I probably won't get a lot of sleep while I'm here.

I'll do my best to find time to write to you but I don't want you to worry if you don't hear from me. I have a lot of work ahead of me but I'll make sure I find time for us.

Give my love to the members of your family who know about us! Especially the person who took your picture for me!

Oh yes, I had a little talk with Ivana about "things". He's just happy that I'm ready to focus on our work again and that's exactly what I need to do right now. But first I'll have supper and soak in a hot bath before I take a short nap. I want to see how Omicron runs after midnight.

Smooches, you gorgeous man!

Nita

While I wrote that I pictured the return flight from Omicron. Would it be too much to have Anita snap a shot of a creature on the wing of the plane before it crashes? Omicron (in this scenario) tests special gas mixtures on mind-controlling parasites but Mathins hasn't expressed much interest in that particular aspect. He wants boobies.

[Billyman]

Originally posted by Koliedrus
Would it be too much to have Anita snap a shot of a creature on the wing of the plane before it crashes?

I think it would be a bit much. If he has a computer he prolly has a tv, vcr, could have a dvd player etc, not to mention a possible movie collection. The movie scenes already posted was a risk within itself.

[Koliedrus]

For some reason I'm having difficulty keeping a cartoonish aspect out of it regardless of his movie knowledge. But, you're right. A bit much.

Lookit! He dressed up for Nita!

[Koliedrus]

And while I was posting that, this came:

Dear Anita,

I hope you are fine wright now.I saw your mail and I am happy to heard
that you appreciate the picture that I sent to you which makes you fill
happy likewise me. I will try as much as I can to sent to you the one
that you demanded maybe before sunday so that you will have it. I am
doing all this just tp prove to you that I love you and I really want us
to be together. I am also happy that you have finally started youirwork
fully as you said, I can see that you are back from you journey which
God is to be thanked over it. I will like to hear from you with you
sweet mail cause I have to stop with this few words because it is night.

Your's darling,
Mathins.


I set him straight about where Anita is. Again.

That creature on the wing is starting to look like an option again.

"Sunday", huh? Well, hell. Nita gets to hang around.

[Billyman]

It's also quite amazing that the whole "transaction” talk has left the building.

Do you play the Harp Kol?

[Koliedrus]

I used to but that was before I was born. My arms were too short to reach all the strings so I had to settle on playing "Smoke On The Water" for my final exam. They didn't even have the decency to tell me I'd flunked. Straight to the tunnel thing with the light at the end and a slap on the ass.

[Koliedrus]

I suppose I'll keep doing daily updates as long as this gentleman provides me with content. The entire exchange has now passed the 100-email mark and my wife tells me that she has trouble remembering that it's me writing for three of the four "people" involved :)

I take that as a compliment!

Today from Togo:

Subject: IT IS AS IF WE ARE TOGETHER HONEY.





Dear Anita,

I saw your maial and I asked my self why the much travelling but I
later realize that it is all about life and what goes with it. I am with
you and I will continue praying for you on your way and on your coming
back each time. I really want you to know that I mise you as you do
because it have goting in my heart as someone I loved which makes me to fill
about you each day. I am happy now that we are beginning to realize
that we are meant to over looked our differencess aside for furure. I
will send you another of my picture as soon as it is ready probabily
before the end of the weekk so that you will see the kind of me that you
really wanted. I am really in need to have you close to me so that we will
fill each other more never mind that i looks as if we are together now.
I am wishing you a happy return and waiting to hear from your mail.

Your's
Mathins.


The hardest part of all this is turning my real self off and forcing one of the other characters to bubble to the surface. It takes more than a little concentration since I'm fighting lies with lies.

Lemme see now....... (Think think think)

[Koliedrus]

THE GATE IS OPEN AND THE BEAST IS ASLEEP!

I recall that as meaning, "your zipper is down".

From the previous post:

I am happy now that we are beginning to realize
that we are meant to over looked our differencess aside for furure.

I've never felt so close to actually yelling, "WEEEEEEEHAAAWWW!"

This one will take some thought. Wish me luck.

For clarification, the emotion is related not to skin but to gender. That "housewife" thing made me want to reach out and slap someone.

[Koliedrus]

Gotta stick to the story so I went OoOOOooOooommm...

Mathins,

I went on my solo inspection after I wrote to you. I hardly recognize Omicron since the last time I was here! I have a lot that I want to tell you but I might get in a lot of trouble...

You have to promise me that you'll keep this to yourself. I could get into a lot of trouble if you tell this to anyone!

I snuck out of my room right after my nap. I was so sleepy that I didn't hear my alarm clock for two whole minutes! I'm still not sure but I think I was still dreaming when I opened my door.

I could hear things going on down the hall somewhere but the echoes made hard to tell where the sounds were coming from. It sounded like a lot of people talking to each other but there was one voice that didn't sound.... normal. I don't know how else to describe it. There were clicks and chatters and then more talking.

My room isn't very far away from where Nocky and Podie lived. When they were alive. I went there first.

Oh Mathins! They've turned that room into... I couldn't recognize the animals anymore! I still don't know if I was just dreaming everything! I really hope I was just having a bad dream.

I woke up in my bed twelve hours later . My clock started beeping and the sun was up.

I'm really confused right now. I don't know what's going on around here and I want to go home. This place is scaring the shit out of me!

Never in my life have I wanted to get back on a jet. You know how I hate to fly. Right now, the only thing I want to think about is you. I'm looking at the pictures you gave me right now. When you told me that you would send another one this weekend.... my heart beats harder just thinking about it!

Oh sweetie, please don't worry about our differences. We'll handle those problems one at a time.

I need to go now,

Nita

[Barbie]

sick bastard :D

[Koliedrus]

Originally posted by Barbie
sick bastard :D

Yes, he is.

Don't forget that.

[Koliedrus]

What a busy couple of hours! I hope no one asks me what my hobbies are while this is going on.

Lemme see if I can make this understandable...





Hmmm... Not so hot at figuring out that whole sender/recipient thing:

Biggun Anita recommends the following web page:

http://www.riversongs.com/Fla/myluv.html

Your RiverSongs Greeting:

Here's Biggun's message:
Dear Honey, I Know that you most have been back from your journey as you said but I still have to get you this because I loved you and think about you all day. I want you to fill me as if I am with you which I Know that we will. YOu means much to me which I have realize that beauty in you as far as my love is concern. I really want to fill you cause I Know that you do and you will continue to do so as I do. Mathins


At least he's consistant with his mistakes.

Your friend Biggun Anita wants you to check out the following webpage, and included this message:

YOu are the love of my life.

Check it out: http://www.riversongs.com/Flas/aboutyou.html



Meanwhile, Ivana is still at LGI while Leslie and Anita are on assignment. Ivana was reprimanded by Leslie (in a flash-traffic memo, whatever the hell THAT is) for sending search results to Mathins accusing him of being a "scammer".

For the record, I never used the word "scammer". I just googled his name and sent him some links.

Mathins doesn't like Ivana.

Subject: I HEARD ALL WHAT YOU SAID.

Dear Ivana,

I hope you are fine today, I recived your mail and all what you said
noted. I want you to know that I have fogorting all what you sdaid or
what you forwarded to me because of my relationship with your family. I
want to take my time now to do things with my Leslie so that we will have
a smooth trnsaction. I also have decided not to have anything what so
ever to do with him because of the way I saw things then which makes me
to fill that you people took me as one of those scanners. I am waiting
to hear from you.

Gure.


The e-cards came during this response from Ivana.
I've seen the movie. He's not so good at reading minds:

[Koliedrus]

Lemme see if I can bring you up to speed...

Anita had a meeting with the director of Omicron. While he stepped out of the office, she used the directors terminal to write a letter to Mathins. The director found it and called another meeting with Anita.

Whew!

Then, Anita explained stuff to Ivana and insisted on coming home (that is, from Omicron to LGI).

Anita wants to come home, Ivana wants her there because she's a key componant of his projects so his real concern with Anita has nothing to do with love; he wants the projects to continue. BUT, Ivana knows that Mathins and Anita have an emotional attachment so he's encouraged Mathins to keep Anita's fragile spirit high while the extraction team is en route to Omicron.

Something like that.

Here we go....


Mathins,

I really hope you're right about that. My meeting with the director lasted for over an hour and a lot of harsh words were exchanged between us. It still has me so upset that I can't sleep.

I think I convinced him that you're a research consultant with high level security clearance. When he asked me about my personal relationship with you I got irate. I was scared and angry when I told him it was none of his f***ing business. You KNOW I had to be mad to use the f-word! He looked like I'd slapped him when I said that. He sat there with his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open so I walked out and slammed the door.

Ivana told me that he'd get me out of here as soon as he can but he wants me to "lay low" until he can arrange everything. I've packed all my things except the nightgown I'm wearing, my laptop and clothes to wear in a few hours.

Oh, how I hope you can send me your new picture soon!! I need to feel like you're beside me!

I've been meaning to ask you something but I've been too ashamed. I once accidentally sent you a picture of me with my top off. I hope that didn't offend you. Please tell me if it did! You're the only other person to see it besides Jared.

I was with 15 other people from LGI at a company retreat last summer. One morning I was swimming in the lake when I THOUGHT everyone was asleep. When I got out of the water, there was Jared with his camera taking pictures of me! He thought he was being funny! When I threatened to tell Leslie about it, he gave me the film and promised never to do anything like that again.

I kept all the pictures :)

Write soon, baby! I have to start getting ready for today. Send me your picture when you can and let me know if mine made you ashamed of me, please!

Nita

Response:

Dear Anita,

I hope ou are fine today, I have not heard from you since today why. I
have waited so as to hear from you which I Really needed to see because
one's I saw your mail like this it makes my day. I saw what you
explained to my yesterday but I was unable to write you just because of my
shedule yesterday. I wasn't available to internet because of I was too
busy yesterday but I Will like you to know that everything is okay which I
know that it is. I am with you bcause you are my love which I want you
to realize that we needed to work towards our furure so that you can be
able to have your self focus on me for the betterment of both of us.

I will like you to know that your brither ivana emailed me and he came
back now to say something nice at list for appreciating me having a
relationship with you but he asked me not to hot you which I woun't do. I
really want to remind you that I didn't see that mail which you said
off because you told me of something like a picture of your which you
snap but it was only me and the snaper that knows about it. I wil like you
to resend it to me which I will appreciate to have because I needed
something to fill about you all days. I will also try as much as I can to
send to you my picture because I do not have a camira and I have to
make out time to go to a place where I will snap it which I Know that I
most send to you this week because it is necessary to send it down to you
for you to view about me more. I will also want you to know that you
have to very carefull in what ever you do because I woun't like a
situation where our love will cost you blow about your future. I am waiting
to hear from your urgent response towards this mail.

Your's partner,
Mathins.

WHAT! He did't keep an accidentally sent pic of Nita topless?
Well damn! I should take some time to teach him about file organization and....
AHHHH! A BillyPunch to the left temple!

Quick jab right back:

Mathins!

Got your mail! Thank you!

Can't write more right now. Here are some of the pictures I mentioned.

More later,

Nita

I can't decide how the plane will crash yet. It could just go silent and Ivana could ask Mathins if he's heard from Nita.

Could crash on the runway.

I'm thinking that Jared shows up in a plane and they try to head for Togo.

Anyway, here are the pics in his in-box right now.

[Koliedrus]

We're now up to email #135. I had Omicron block email traffic between Anita and Ivana. Mathins was apparently at his computer so I kept him busy by having him relay coded instructions from one to the other.

The last one from Ivana to Anita told her that a chopper was on the way for an immediate Scoop & Run. Ivana then sent mathins a picture taken from inside the chopper of Anita running toward it.

I haven't sent him anything for a few days now. This morning, I get this:

Subject: I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU HONEY.





Dear Anita,

I Hope you are fine today, I have waited to hear from you uptill today
and I have not see any mail from you that is why I decided to email you
now so as to know what went wrong although you told me that you will
now be geting to me for some time without explaining why. I am really
worried to hear from you because your mail makes me to gorget some
certain things which I am thinking off. I Really know that you know that I
Loe you which I most say that you make my day. I am hear thinking about
you which I want you also to fill me no matter where we are. I Know for
sure that one day we will be together so as to share things and fill
each other. I am waiting to hear from your mail.

Your's Husband,
Mathins.

That just makes my skin crawl. I think I'll just put her in a coma and let him sweat for a while.

Here's the shot from inside the chopper.

[Koliedrus]

I thought he'd better get something from someone. And dammit! I'm not ready to kill Anita!

Twisty-turny....

Mr. Gure,

I thought you should know why Anita has not been in contact with you recently. I will explain as much as I am able.

During her stay at Omicron, Anita made some important discoveries relating to a research project that was being carried on in our absence. The project involves a unique type of parasite that alters the host's metabolism and neurological functions. Anita discovered that many of the staff at the facility had become infected and that three or more humans were purposefully infected.

If you look closely at the picture that was transmitted by the extraction unit, you'll see that Anita has an infected child in her arms.

Unfortunately, Anita herself became infected because of her heroics. Her infection was discovered during her medical examination at LGI. Once Anita learned of her infection and the possible consequences, she immediately agreed to be placed in cryogenic suspension.

Mr. Gure, Anita is alive but she is frozen. Her situation is critical but she is stable.

My team has been working non-stop on finding a way to remove the parasite without causing harm to Anita. You have my word that we are doing our best.

She will remain in stasis until we are absolutely sure that we will be able to revive her without causing damage. When that time comes, she will certainly be overjoyed to see messages from you. Please continue to write to her.


Anita told me once that you are a spiritual man. Your prayers are appreciated.

I will keep you informed as conditions warrant and time permits.

Sincerely,

I.B.

Punt to the chest. And it's.....

[Koliedrus]

GOOD!

Dear Ivana,

I hope you are fine today, I am happy to hear from you so as to what to
told me about anita. I am worried of the whole story when I opened my
box and saw what you wrote me about her. I really heard all how it
happens but I hope that the sickness woun't go too far from hurting her. She
only told me that she woun't be writing me for some time and in that
case I should not worry if I Didn't hear from her and I have been writing
her since then demanding what actually should make her not to write but
I have not hear rom her since then so that is why I am worried. I
happens to understand everything for now but I want you to know that I am
with her which I will like yopu to know that everythiung is okay but all
I will do now is to pray for her to be well so that we will conrinue to
talk to each other. I want you to visit her day by day and time to time
so that you will know what to do about her health. Please extend my
greeting to her and try as much as you can to update me as time pamit you
to do so. I am waiting for her quick recovery.

Your's sincerelly,
Mathins.

Suspended animation it is!

Now, if I can only stay interested.

Mr. Gure.



I'm sorry. I'm formal with you out of habit.



Mathins,

I want to assure you that Anita is my first priority. Her cryo-tank is no more than 50 meters from me and her vital signs can trigger a vast number of alarms. I'm wearing a wristband that vibrates when her condition changes.

Nita saved a young boy. She knew she would be infected but she brought him to the extrraction point. She had no concern about her own future or her safety.

Mr. Gure, my sister's selfless actions have me convinced that there is a higher purpose in the daily activities of people.

I've just come back from checking on Nita's Sarco. She remains stable. The secondary team will watch her while I take some rest.

The young man she tried to save didn't make it. I ask you to prepare your heart for the worst and hope for the best.

I.B.

[Koliedrus]

Now he's writing to Ivana for updates and sending love letters to Anita to read when she wakes up.

At least he's too occupied to scam.

Mathins,

It is important that you understand the severity of Anita's condition. She is not yet "better" but thankfully she is no worse.

The last twelve hours have been difficult but we have managed to keep her stabilized. It appears as though the parasite has the ability to adjust its host's body temperature by directly stimulating areas of the brain which control metabolic activity. Last night, her body temperature began to rise. The parasite adjusted the temperature of its environment in order to counteract our efforts to reduce Anita's metabolic rate.

It doesn't like the cold so it heated her up.

Because Anita is in a SARCO (Stability Augmentation Rapid Correction Obelisk), we were able to reduce her metabolism even as the parasite attempted to burn her from the inside.

I cannot authorize pictures of Anita in her current condition but I can give you an idea of what her "bed" looks like. I believe she would want that.

I will attach a picture of the SARCO prototype and her containment kiosk. The prototype stands vertically. Anita's SARCO is a much more advanced unit.

I will update you as I am able but you must know in advance that we are prepared to keep Anita in stasis for the forseeable future. Her death is not an option.

Ivana

[Koliedrus]

I've received queries but I've kept everyone silent since that last message.

Sweat.

[Koliedrus]

Anita is being brought out of stasis. Slowly.

[Koliedrus]

That was Anita when she was originally put into her SARCO.

This is her today.

[Koliedrus]

Down at the (surgical) bay...

Mathins,

The parasite has shown no signs of activity for several days but we cannot immediately determine its functional status. In order to make an accurate assesment, it has been decided that Anita should be slowly brought out of stasis while we monitor the parasite's apparent dormancy.

As of 21-March-04, 1420 GMT, we have been slowly raising Anita's metabolic rate. Her vital signs have remained within normal ranges throughout the process.

The parasite is showing no detectable indication of activity.

In the days ahead, Anita will be "awake" once again. We will closely monitor her. If the parasite remains dormant, she may soon be able to contact you.

I must warn you, however: Anita will have to submit to a rather invasive surgical procedure in order to have the parasite completely removed.

At her current rate of progress, she should be awake before you return from your journey Her surgery is tentatively scheduled to proceed after she has been awake for four days.

We have decided to allow Anita the comfort of returning to her home in order to facilitate a sense of calm and normalcy. As a precaution, we have placed cameras in strategic locations so that we can respond quickly.

I wish you a safe trip, my friend. Anita will be back with us soon. I promise.

I.B.




Attached is a pic of one of the surgery bays in the TREE House (The Reception/Extraction Event House).

Anita has a goal. Her parasite will see to it.

[Barbie]

This is getting so whacked.

What has Mathins said?

[Koliedrus]

Nothing yet. He's gonna be gone for the week.

I've prepped picks of Anita escaping with the parasite on her back. I think she wants to go to Togo for some reason ;)

BTW: I picked up The Puppet Masters (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111003/) in a markdown bin several years ago.

Rent it for shits and giggles.

[Koliedrus]

Here's a screenshot that may help you get an idea of why I'm not posting every little nuance.

Red is to Anita.
Green is to Ivana.

Note that Anita hasn't read the two e-cards sent after she was rescued from Omicron.

She'll read them when I'm good and ready for her to wake up :D

[Billyman]

Hehe, as the pics unfolded onto the screen, I recognized the movie right away. :D

[Barbie]

The movie is Puppet Master?

I'm all confused.

enlighten me....

[Koliedrus]

Can't. If I told you, I'd have to stand on one leg and juggle four lawn gnomes. I'm not up to that kind of pressure.

[Barbie]

sO????????? What's going on?

[Kayla]

HOW DID IT END!

fuck you kol for linking me to this at work, i got NOTHING done in the last hour

[Koliedrus]

Oh!

Ivana told Mathins that she was loose, looking for him and not to let her touch him.

Silly nightmare stuff like that. Something that lurks.

The End.

[Asmodeus]

Don't worry General Macgyver and SG-1 will save you!

"Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin." Said some Igor lookalike Jimmy Hoffa wannabee.

Torquemada wore garters.

Philip Roth doesn't want anyone to know he got a vacuum pump stuck up his ass which is why he can't write worth a damn.

"And now for something completely different..."