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Barbie
04-15-2003, 07:45 PM
CANADIAN WINS MASTERS; SINCE WHEN DID AUGUSTA ADMIT CANADIANS? (http://www.dailyhog.com/Masters_Canadian.htm)

AUGUSTA, Ga. - There must be some kind of mistake, a Canadian golfer wins the Masters? A sentiment being echoed across the country today, as news the famous Green Jacket will adorn the back of a Canadian becomes a reality.

Augusta National Golf Course, well known for its high standards in accepting members, admitted today, that there may have been an oversight on their part, in allowing a Canadian to compete on the fertile blades of grass that so well define the breathtaking course, in the heart of Dixie.

Augusta club chairman, Hootie Johnson appeared visibly shaken when Mike Weir was introduced as the first Canadian to win the Masters in the history of the tournament. Last Year's winner, Tiger Woods presented Mike Weir with the traditional "Green Jacket" but refused to address Weir as Master.

"This all started when Augusta National admitted its first black member in 1990. Since then, women have been demanding entry, and now, the damn Canadians want in", said Johnson.

For his part, Mike Weir, admitted he didn't officially inform the Augusta board of directors he was a Canadian. "I just assumed they knew, after all, why else would I have a hockey stick on my club roster?", said Weir.

Long time club member Davis Nash said he felt betrayed by the news. "I still can't believe it... I mean what's next... some queer guy demanding membership, or worse yet winning?"

President Bush, who cancelled his first official trip to Canada this month, because the Canadian government refused to support America in the War on Iraq, also broke the long standing tradition of calling and congratulating the Masters champion.

mute
04-16-2003, 03:40 AM
Too bad he wasn't like Happy Gilmore so he could stick up for himself.

Dave Letterman
He got a bogey :)

I like Letterman though, but he's probably getting ripped up because of his nationality.

Pianomahnn
04-16-2003, 04:11 AM
Fuck nationality.

Just make sure it stays men only.

Barbie
04-16-2003, 04:30 AM
Originally posted by Pianomahnn
Just make sure it stays men only.




:squint2:

simiantics
04-16-2003, 04:39 PM
Long time club member Davis Nash said he felt betrayed by the news. "I still can't believe it... I mean what's next... some queer guy demanding membership, or worse yet winning?"

I wonder if this was sarcastic at all? I'm pretty sure there must be at least one or two gay members... they just don't happent to be waving rainbow flags.

Cruise Director
04-16-2003, 05:27 PM
They forgot to mention that he and his family now reside in Utah. That would have been worth another two paragraphs worth of jokes. :D